Go where you wanna go

I always feel like things happen for a reason, and as Paulo Coelho said, "All the universe conspires in helping you". So when he called me from JFK on Dec. 30th, he was about to go through airport security and get aboard a plane for Rome. Meanwhile, I was making my first solo walk through New York City, up 34th street, Pink Berry in hand. If I had been home, sitting in my room, I think I would have felt a lot worse. I felt almost prepared. I went through Macy's which was crazy crowded with people of all shapes and sizes hurrying around. Note: There's life beyond minor problems. Life goes on. With or without you.

And this is definitely difficult. To say the least. I remember this feeling and it's like when you get the wind knocked out of you. Or when you go down the steep part of a roller coaster. He has gone and will be gone for quite a while. The thing about him is, I could list 453453 reasons why I should not even be remotely interested nor care whatsoever. And unfortunately that ISN'T the case. I had a "perfect relationship" that I chose to give up. Not because I knew he and I would immediately fall in love and date and be happy. But because he was what I wanted. And he, was what I got.

More or less.

I really miss him. I really do.